TAMPA, Fl. - Do we really know how to give a good compliment these days? Or to receive one, for that matter?
"You don’t know what people are going through with their day, so it’s nice to compliment,” said Tia Young, Director of the Tampa Etiquette Academy.
Young says a genuine compliment serves two purposes. It not only serves to brighten the day of the person on the receiving end, it also benefits the person who delivered it.
"They lift the spirits of those around you when you give a compliment in that it makes that person feel good, and the person that gives it—you feel good as well," said Young.
Young says it’s especially important to talk to each other in a positive way, because we simply do less of it these days.
“Technology has taken over, so people don’t know how to communicate face to face anymore," said the Etiquette coach.
Here are a few tips on giving and receiving compliments, from Psychology Today magazine:
-- Keep it Real: Fake flattery is usually detected, and you look untrustworthy.
-- Be specific: Tell them why they were great in a given situation.
-- Be appropriate: Make sure the compliment is appropriate to the situation.
Young says it’s equally important to be gracious in accepting compliments.
Here are some pointers:
-- Accept the compliment: If you’re told you look nice today, don’t rebuff it and say you feel fat or ugly. It sucks the positivity from the situation and invalidates the person giving you the compliment.
-- Be gracious: Say thank you. Look the person who’s given you the gift of the compliment in the eye, and return the gift with a smile.
Compliments make a better world, according to psychologists. Taking notice of the positive things around you, and reinforcing them with praise, can be as important to your mental health as exercise is to your physical health.